


Life goes on (I don't)

by trinipedia



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Christmas, Fanfiction, Gift Fic, M/M, SPN J2 Secret Santa, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-02
Updated: 2010-01-02
Packaged: 2018-09-03 19:13:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8726920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trinipedia/pseuds/trinipedia
Summary: Jared Padalecki, one of the country's most powerful producers, sweeps the nation in a frenzy when he decides to conduct a nationwide talent search to cast the lead in the movie version of the most popular soap opera of all times.Jensen Ackles, main character of the soap opera since its beginning and Jared's on-again, off-again lover, is a star of epic proportion and expected to get the part.While Jensen schemes to nail down the role and he and Jared start a petty war without rules, the participants to the casting start their own road to fame. Some of them are ready to do whatever it takes to become the next big thing.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a [](http://spn-j2-xmas.livejournal.com/profile)[**spn_j2_xmas**](http://spn-j2-xmas.livejournal.com/) present for [](http://angstpuppy.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://angstpuppy.livejournal.com/)**angstpuppy**. I'm so, SO sorry for the unexcusable delay, I really hope you'll like this and it will be worth the wait.
> 
> DISCLAIMERS: Based on the "Casi Divas" Mexican movie, so if there's anything you think you recognize, I probably didn't write it. Aside from that, don't know them, never happened, I'm still poor.

The slap is so hard it echoes in the silence of the room.  
"How dare you?" the red-haired girl exclaims, trembling in rage "I demand an explanation!"  
The man sighs, a hand on his reddening cheek.  
"I don't love you, nor I feel anything for you anymore, Tish" he states.  
"There you have it."  
The girl gasps.  
"Are you trying to tell me you feel nothing when I touch you?"  
"Not a thing."  
She covers the distance between them in a couple of hurried steps and grabs his arms, shaking him furiously.  
"Say it again if you dare!"  
The guy's sad expression turns into pure rage in the span of a moment, before he rudely pushes the girl away.  
"Get your paws off me, bitch! Stop shaking me! Cut!"  
The girl blinks, lifting her hands up.  
"But-the director told me to!"  
"To hell with the director" the guy growls "when you jiggle me, I wobble all over!"  
"Maybe you'd simply have to go to the gym and tone up your flabby triceps then" the girl mutters, and the guy glares at her.  
"Fuck you, Danneel."  
"Let's chill out, guys" the director intervenes.  
"I'm sorry, Jensen. Can we perhaps take it back from the top? I will-"  
"Fuck you too, Jim" Jensen snaps.  
"I don't want to talk to you. Where's the damn producer of this damn soap opera?! I'll have to talk to him, since obviously nobody here knows how to treat a star who slaves 16 hours a day! Instead you shine these glaring infomercial lights that pick up wrinkles I don't even have. I look past 30, thanks to you fuckers!"  
The PAs and the actors look at each other for a second before the director snaps his fingers.  
"Come on, people, you heard him. Let's find Jared."  
Everyone starts moving at the same time, save from a couple of technicians, who are apparently reading a magazine so interesting that they didn't notice all the drama.  
As Jensen approaches them, they hide it.  
"And you? What are you hiding?" he inquires suspiciously.  
"Hand it over. Now!"  
He snatches the magazine from the guy's hands and starts reading it.  
As he does, his expression gets progressively more pissed off.

 

 

**-Loving Eric - Jensen won't be Eric Brady anymore?-**

_Check it out, people! You all know Loving Eric, right? The most divine soap opera on Texas screens?  
It has been rolling during the last five years, and just look at Jensen Ackles.  
Is he done for? Is he not?  
We'll leave it to our beloved audience to decide, but meanwhile we have a really juicy gossip for you all, just as we promised in the last issue of Best in Texas: careful, it's just a rumor for now, pure grapevine.  
Still interested?  
That's what we hoped.  
Our contact down in Hollywood told us that they're preparing a movie version of Loving Eric!  
The producers are going to scout the whole country looking for the new Eric Brady; anyone, from anywhere, can audition to become the next movie superstar!  
Can you imagine it? Wake up one morning and discover you're a star...who wouldn't want that?  
Jensen Ackles, undisputed soap opera male diva, most renowned for his role as Eric Brady, refused to comment on the search for his successor for the movie version of the role that immortalized him. And now, some reactions from the world of showbiz..._

 

 

"Maybe we can try it all again? No shaking. Look, we're all set, Jen. Let's calm down, ok?"  
Jim clears his throat as he approaches Jensen warily.  
"Jensen? Jensen, if you'd be so kind-"  
Jensen doesn't answer.  
He simply throws the magazine in his face and stomps away towards Jared's office.  
"Well, if he wants to look less than thirty, he has to start acting on a radio play" Danneel states, and Jim smacks her.  
"You idjit! That's Jensen Ackles you're talking about. He's a pillar of the industry. Don't you dare."

 

 

A barely dressed girl is sitting on the desk in Jared's office.  
She grabs Jared's hands and puts them on her tits.  
"Do you think I need a boob job?" she asks, batting her eyelashes.  
Jared palpates them professionally and hums.  
"Maybe just a little, so that we can-"  
The door of his office slams open, as Jensen storms in followed by Jared's secretary.  
"I'm sorry, Jared, I told him you were on a long distance call but he-"  
"Yeah, well, I think you two are pretty close for it to be a long distance, Jay" Jensen snorts interrupting her.  
Jared smiles at them like it's all routine and greets the guy.  
"Jensen! It's always a pleasure seeing you, man."  
Then he turns towards the girl, squeezing some more.  
"I'd say, two sizes bigger. This way, they'll look perfect on screen."  
The girl looks smug, so Jensen just hisses at her.  
Jared throws a glance at his secretary, and she grabs the girl's arm.  
"Ok, miss Cortese, I guess you're done. Follow me please..."  
Once they're gone, since Jensen's eyes keep throwing daggers at him, Jared stands up and walks up to him.  
"Jensen, you know perfectly well that-"  
Jensen lifts a hand.  
"Save your breath. I stopped caring about who you screw since your little video with what's-her-face. And that was, what? Two, three hundred little sluts ago?"  
Jared sighs.  
"Really, Jensen. What happened to us? Where did we go wrong?"  
He steps closer to him and slowly caresses Jensen's cheek.  
Jensen makes a pained little noise that tears Jared's heart.  
"Do you want to know where did we go wrong?" Jensen asks.  
"I was the one who went wrong. I wanted for us to be a real couple, I got tired of living a lie, but no. You had your career, your image, your reputation to protect, so when the first rumors started to fly you preferred to go and fuck the first whore in heat you could find then stand by my side and defend what we were. Or at least, what I thought we were. Well, I had a career too, Jared. I had way more to lose than you had, and I was ready to throw it all away for you. What an idiot, uh?"  
Jared doesn't know what to say to that, he knows Jensen's right but he's still not ready to face it, so he does the next best thing: he holds him closer and tries to kiss him.  
However, Jensen pushes him away and chuckles.  
"Oh, no, baby, this stuff won't work with me this time, you know why? 'Cause I'm not 20 anymore."  
Jared narrows his eyes, feeling rejected and a little pissed.  
"Yeah, you're not. And you can scream at the light guy as much as you want, but he's a pro and you're thirty-fi-"  
Jensen slams him against the wall.  
"Don't fuck with me, Jared. Dim the lights or I'm history."  
Jared snickers.  
"Jensen, please. Even NASA's technology couldn't make you look 22."  
Jensen narrows his eyes and steps back.  
"If I were you, I'd watch the way you talk to me: don't forget that I'm this network's biggest star."  
Jared walks up to his desk, grabs a few pages and gives them to Jensen.  
"Well, 'network's biggest star', take a look at yesterday's ratings" he says.  
"They're way far from how they were five years ago. Things change, Jensen."  
Jensen studies the papers, then huffs and throws them back on the desk.  
"It's a crappy part and you know it!" he objects.  
"The dialogues suck and the story is stall...what I need to do is star in that movie, and then everything will be alright. You just have to kill these stupid rumors that aren't good for any of us."  
Jared sneers.  
"Actually, no one ever said that you were going to play that part."  
Jensen stares at him, stunned.  
"What? you're not serious. Come on, Jared, you know that no one else can play that part. I _am_ Eric Brady."  
Jared rolls his eyes.  
" _You_ come on, Jensen. Who's going to find you believable in the role of a virginal, naïve, small-town boy at your age?!"  
Jensen looks a little hurt at the comment, but recovers quickly.  
"What the fuck are you talking about?!" he growls.  
"Name one actor who can play that part, just _one_."  
Jared shrugs.  
"Turn over any rock and out crawls an actor. That's how I discovered you, remember?"  
"And who were you before you discovered me, uh?" Jensen retorts.  
"You were nobody, baby. Nobody. My success made you."  
Jared sits back in his chair and crosses his arms on his chest.  
"You can blabber as much as you want, but I'm still going to do it."  
"Do what?"  
"Setting up a nationwide casting for the new Eric Brady. First thing tomorrow. I'll find him. I will, I swear to God."  
Jensen approaches the desk and smashes his fists on it.  
"No. You wouldn't dare."  
"Watch me" Jared snarls.  
Jensen bites his lower lip and looks like he's about to cry.  
In the end, he simply lifts his chin and stares at Jared with eyes watery but defiant.  
"Please, don't do this. You must have had something to make me love you as much as I did, Jared."  
Jensen walks away without another word, and only once he's gone Jared hides his face in his hands, his shoulders trembling, and lets his mask fall to pieces.

 

 

"Thank you for coming, everyone" Jared greets his group as they take a seat for the first team meeting.  
"In today's world, no one wants to see 400 episodes of the poor little virgin" Jared explains.  
"Now the virgin's gotta be in all the tabloids, have scandalous divorces and sleep with soccer stars. Bullshit like that. Man, how the mighty rise and fall...anyway, this is how it's going to go down: three phases."  
He turns on a projector and shows them a few explanatory slides.  
"First of all, high exposure casting, with aerial shots, interviews and maybe the cameo of a few hopeless cases: that's what sells, human interest, melodrama.  
Then we narrow it down to 50 for the semifinals and only 10 for the grand finale.  
Live broadcasts, phone-in votes, judges...the usual drill.  
We're obviously not going to pluck him off the street, but that's the whole point.  
We'll polish him and polish him and then polish him some more, until we turn him into a star like-"  
The door slams open and Jensen stomps in.  
"Do you mind to explain what the fuck is this?" he growls, throwing a magazine on the table.  
Jared sighs.  
"-like Jensen Ackles, for instance" he concludes.  
Alona, Jared's secretary, steps closer to Jensen.  
"Don't you want to wait outside as we-"  
"NO."  
Alona lowers her head, resigned, then just snaps her fingers and everyone stands up, following her out.  
They're all used to the Jared-Jensen dynamic, by now, and know better than to question it.  
Meanwhile, Jared looks at the magazine, shaking his head as he does.  
"This is most definitely not what I asked for" he states once he's done.  
Jensen looks pleased.  
"So how did it get in the papers?"  
Jared shrugs, then lifts a finger and picks up the phone.  
"Alona, send in the layout guy, urgently. They misspelled the title."  
He hangs up and grins smugly at Jensen.  
"Still, it's not bad, uh?"  
Jensen is livid.  
"You see? The things you can think up when you're under pressure..." Jared continues and Jensen grimaces.  
"You're so damn cynical, Jared, you disgust me. But this is not the end of it: it's just the beginning. You want war? I'll give you war."  
As Jensen opens the door, a dozen of cameras flash at his face, so he hurriedly closes it again.  
"Jensen, how many times did I tell you that door-slamming rattles the set?" Jared whines.  
Jensen narrows his eyes, opens the door again and slams it as hard as he can as he leaves, making a framed picture fall on the floor; it doesn't break, because Jared is used to Jensen too, and had the glass removed.  
Jared sighs and shakes his head.  
"What the fuck am I doing?" he murmurs.

 

 

 _My name is Brock Kelly and I'm 21.  
I live in Wilmington, South Carolina.  
I adore my mom and dad, they're my best friends.  
M family is of long lineage, the surname Kelly goes back generations, which is why my dad is obsessed with protecting it; if he gets wind of the contest, he'll kill both me and my mum.  
You know, he used to pretend he was a banker, when he was a kid, and once he grew up he made it.  
I'm just like him: I have always dreamt of being an actor, I kind of visualized myself that way, but...I was a bit on the pudgy side-kids mocked me and all that jazz.  
Then one day I went on a diet, and bam!  
I've got a strong willpower, but the most comes from my family motto: **if you see it, you can go for it.**  
I lost fifty pounds, and I keep dropping fast.  
The point is that the camera adds weight; I'm two sizes smaller than I look on screen, and I have to think ahead, since I'll be on screen forever-because I am doing that movie, and then another, and tons more.  
So, next time I'll meet my dad, it will probably be at the Oscars ceremony; we'll see if he'll still have something to say, then._  
"Brock, it's time to go: your dad's still sleeping and Clifford is outside ready to drive you to the airport."  
_This is it. My chance. I'm going to Dallas to change my life._

 

 

Jared wakes up yawning, and as he rubs the sleep off his eyes he turns on the TV, as usual, leaving the room to go get a coffee.

_We're expecting a high of 50 today, clear skies.  
And here's Brian bringing you the hottest news from showbiz._

_Good morning, Dallas! The clip we're about to show you it's seriously revealing, so you might want for your kids to get out of the room. Seems like the hottest producer of the moment is-really hot._

Jared chokes on his coffee and hurries back in the room just in time to stare in shock at a video of himself with a lap dancer.

_"I could help you go far on TV."  
"Baby, do you like my tits? I bought them just for you..."  
"I've never seen better."_

The image fades and the reporter appears again on screen, explaining that the video was sent to the channel by an unidentified source, as Jared's phone rings.  
"Hello?" he answers, tentatively  
"Hi there" a sensual, low voice says.  
"How are you doing on this fine morning?"  
Jared needs a couple of seconds to recognize that voice.  
"...Jensen?"  
On the other end of the line, Jensen chuckles.  
"Life is weird, isn't it? Three years ago, when I got that video of the two of you, I thought it was only good for fucking up my life. But guess what? It's also good for fucking up yours. You see? The things you can think up when you're under pressure..."  
Jared groans.  
"Jensen, dammit, it was just that once. It was a mistake, I told you so. I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry, I should have never-and you didn't have to put it on national TV, for God's sake!"  
There's a moment of silence, and Jared can almost see Jensen clamming up.  
"Have fun today at your selections, Jay."

 

 

The reporter clears his throat, as a green light turns on on the top of the camera.  
"Good morning, Texas!  
We're outside the TV studio, where more than 3000 of the hottest guys in the country are waiting to apply for the casting.  
The place is packed and full of energy: let's hear it from some of them."

 

  
"What's your name?"  
"Colin."  
"Excited?"  
"Totally!"  
"Aren't you a little young for the role?"  
"No, I don't think so. No one has said how old Eric is gonna be in the movie."  
"Ok, then, how do you think you resemble Eric Brady?"  
"My hair, my style, my whole look, obviously."  
"I see. Are you confident?"  
"Of course I am. I'll win this thing."  
  
***  
  
"Ben, are you excited?"  
"A bunch."  
"How hard it was for you to do this?"  
"Very. Tons of tests, gigantic trips..."  
"Really? Where are you coming from?"  
"Arlington."  
"...but that's like half an hour drive from here."  
"You're forgetting the traffic! At this hour is HELL."  
  
***  
  
"Why do you want to play Eric Brady, Jake?"  
*blushes*  
"I don't know. I guess I've admired him since when I was little."  
  
***  
  
"Are you feeling confident?"  
"Absolutely."  
"In what, Mike?"  
"My...self-confidence, I think."  
  
***  
  
"Brock, what would you be willing to do to get the part?"  
"Whatever it takes."  
  
***  
  
"Where did you get that shirt?"  
"Here."  
"Way to go! Support local commerce! And tell me, Tom, haute couture?"  
"Nah, not really. Chinese shop on the corner."  
  
***  
  
"Ready for the casting?"  
"Yeth, I'm a thuper thar!"  
"...what's your name?"  
"Eric Brady, DUH."  
"...cut."  
  
***

  
  
"Let them in" a PA shouts, as the reporter wraps up his report "Number 1 to 100, get ready!"  
Once they're all standing on a line, Jared starts walking in front of them, pointing at them as he goes.  
"No, no, no, yes, no, yes, no, no, _God_ no, no, yes, no, no, no, _wrong program, Rapunzel_ , no, no, no, yes, _this is a PG-13 movie, you skank_ , no, no, _what the Hell were you thinking?!_ , no, no, no, yes, no, no, _if you wax your chest then yes_ , no, no, _this is not a sweet sixteen party_ , yes, no, yes, no, no, no..."

 

 

As Jared tries to leave the studio, at the end of a very tiring and frustrating morning, he's assaulted by reporters.  
"How many more girls did you give the same treatment to, Padalecki?"  
"Got any more videos like that hidden somewhere?"  
"Don't you have any respect for your profession and those who work with you?"  
Jared lifts both of his hands.  
"Please, guys. Let me out. I'll hold a press conference at 6 and I'll answer to all of your questions."  
The reporters still try to ask some more, but Jared makes his way through them and finally drives away.

 

 

Jake is queueing to get his wristband proving he's in for the next step of selections when Brock cuts in front of him.  
"Hey, you! Wait for your turn!" he exclaims.  
Brock grabs his arm and forces him to move away.  
"Listen, you prick" he hisses, his eyes glaring dangerously "this is my place, and if you don't respect it I'll mess your face so bad they'll have to hide it with make up, tomorrow."  
Jake steps back, even if his eyes are throwing daggers at Brock, and Brock holds his wrist out grinning triumphantly.

 

 

"I don't know" Jared splutters in his cellphone, as his manager shouts at him "I have no idea where they got it, Dan. So I-"  
The elevator opens and Jared gapes: laying on his couch, wearing only dress pants and an unbuttoned white shirt, there's Jensen.  
He's drinking from a champagne flute and once he lifts his eyes and sees Jared there, he smirks.  
"Your maid's my fan" he says, winking, and Jared snorts, shaking his head as he turns off the phone.  
Of course she is.  
There are a million things he wants to say to Jensen, like _what took you so long_ or _I've missed coming home and finding you here waiting for me_ or even just _I still love you, let's try again_ , but in the end all he manages to choke out is "Why are you here?"  
Jensen shrugs.  
"I just came to see you in your starring role, babe" he answers, then nods towards the TV, where Jared's press conference is being shown.  
Jared walks up to him, slaps Jensen's legs off the couch and sits next to him.  
"This bachelor's flat is not bad" Jensen states, conversationally, but Jared knows him well enough to know he's nervous.  
"I'm only human, and I made a mistake" Jared is saying, on TV "I'm not made of stone, guys, come on. You of all people should understand."  
There's a moment of silence in the room, before Jared goes on with his declarations.  
"I just want to emphasize that the movie has nothing to do with this. Loving Eric belongs to the fans."  
Jensen turns to look at Jared, arching an eyebrow, and he's about to comment on this last statement when Jared puts a finger on his mouth, effectively shutting him up.  
"Listen to this part."  
Jensen, too shocked to react, focuses his attention on the screen once more.  
"Were there only girls involved in this-market?" a reporter is asking.  
"Yeah, what about Jensen?" another one echoes "what did he do in order to get the role?"  
Jensen's eyes widen, and Jared grins.  
On screen, his counterpart narrows his eyes.  
"Jensen is a great professional. A real pro. His talent is not something that can be bought. Or sold."  
Jensen gapes at Jared, who looks positively smug.  
"He'd never stoop to a trick so low."  
As the questions move towards a different direction, Jared turns off the TV, crosses his arms on his chest and turns to face Jensen, who's gulping down his champagne.  
"You're such a hot shit" he mutters, and Jared steals his glass.  
"Yeah, I guess it's one point for me" he states, emptying it.  
Jensen rolls his eyes.  
"Whatever."  
Then he seems to remember something.  
"By the way, how was your casting? Did you find a lot like me?" he asks.  
Jared sighs.  
"You know very well that there's nobody like you, Jensen" he answers.  
He so tired of this, tired of lying to everyone and especially to himself, but he can't give in to Jensen.  
If he does, he'll show he's weak, and who knows when and how Jensen will take advantage of it.  
"Which is why I'll have to _make_ another you, instead" he adds.  
Jensen glares and moves in to hit him, but Jared was expecting it and blocks his arm.  
"Oh, we've already gotten to the high-drama face slap" he says, chuckling, as Jensen snaps his arm back "you know, Jen, life isn't a soap opera."  
Jensen blinks, then without a warning grabs Jared's balls and squeezes.  
Hard.  
Jared sees stars, and not in a good way.  
"I never saw this in a soap, Jared. Have you?" he hisses.  
"Let go" Jared begs in between clenched teeth.  
Jensen snorts.  
"Let go of _what_? There's nothing left in here" he states, but his hold turns into something softer without him noticing.  
Jared notices, though, and so does his cock, which immediately responds to the known touch.  
He sighs again, but this time in pleasure.  
"You love to put your hands down there" he murmurs, and that's enough for Jensen to snap out of whatever haze he was in.  
"That's what you like to think" he hisses, standing up and stepping away from the couch, grabbing his jacket as if he's about to leave, but Jared won't let him.  
Not this time.  
He grabs his arm, and when Jensen turns to snarl at him he simply leans in and kisses him, taking advantage of Jensen's open mouth to push his tongue inside.  
For a moment it feels like Jensen will fight him, but then the moment's gone and Jensen fists Jared's shirt to get him even closer, as he kisses him back.  
Jared's hand cups Jensen's cheek, as he breaks the kiss and stares into his eyes.  
"I hate you" Jensen growls, punching Jared's chest.  
Jared grins.  
"Feeling's mutual, sweetheart" he answers, before leaning in again and getting lost in Jensen's taste.  
Jensen starts unbuttoning Jared's shirt, and his fingers linger on his naked chest, playing with Jared's nipples and enjoying the little groans Jared makes as they harden.  
"You still like my body, uh?" Jared says, a little smug.  
"Am I better than that football star you dated?"  
Jensen chuckles.  
"Come on, Jen, how could you do that?! It's the cliche of all cliches..."  
"Well, it got to you didn't it?" Jensen points out, and Jared can't really reply to that.  
They make out for a little more, but just as Jared undoes Jensen's belt buckle Jensen grabs his wrist and stops him.  
Jared lifts his hooded eyes on Jensen questioningly.  
"The casting's off, right?" Jensen inquires, his expression hopeful and pleading.  
Jared sighs.  
He knew this was going too well.  
"Jensen, you know I can't call it off just like that" he explains, and sees Jensen's emotions lock away in the back of his eyes, as the sparkle in there fades.  
Then he realizes the casting is not the only thing they're discussing.  
"Listen, why don't we-why don't we just put you in another movie, with a more complex script and a character more interesting, layered? Mature?" Jared suggests.  
Jensen blinks.  
"What do you mean?"  
Jared stares pointedly at him.  
"We already talked about it. You dye your grey hair."  
Jensen pushes him away.  
"Fuck you, Jared."  
"Jensen, please! You can't expect me to just-it's gonna take time, you know, for me to-" Jared is unable to finish the sentence, but he's not above begging for Jensen not to leave.  
Jensen rolls his eyes.  
"And meanwhile what, Jared? You'll buy me a house in the suburbs where no one knows us? Will you sneak out when it's still dark, hoping no one catches you or you'll have to hire another skank to fuck publicly for people not to doubt about your sexuality?"  
He snorts.  
"I'm done being your dirty little secret, Jared. I'm SO done."  
He grabs his jacket from the couch and puts it on, looking anywhere but straight at Jared.  
"You keep doing your casting. I'll keep doing my little war."  
Jared clenches his jaw.  
So this is how it's gonna be.  
"I'm going to let what happened today slide for the old times' sake, but enough is enough, Jensen."  
Jensen finally lifts his head up, his eyes blazing.  
"This has only just begun."  
He walks up to the elevator and calls it, his back turned on Jared, who simply crosses his arms on his naked chest.  
"Yeah, in-built elevators tend to ruin dramatic exits" he says, and Jensen growls.  
"Drop dead, you and your grey-haired balls, motherfucker" he hisses.  
Jared lifts his hands.  
As the elevator keeps dinging, Jensen taps impatiently on the wall with his fingertips.  
Jared reaches the table, gets the champagne bottle and the glass and steps towards his bedroom.  
"Still two floors to go" he points out, before slamming the door shut behind him.  
Jensen bangs his head against the wall as soon as he's alone, not knowing that Jared's doing the same.

 

 

Jensen hums some old tune, as he lays with his eyes closed in the make up trailer.  
The session is taking up longer than he expected, but that's probably because he didn't sleep much after the- _incident_ with Jared.  
He has been fooling himself for years, he has repeated times and times again to everyone who knew about them that he was over Jared, that he didn't miss him, that he could barely remember how his kisses felt and the way his fingertips made Jensen's skin tingle.  
After last night, though?  
Jensen knows he can't keep lying.  
After he barely got it all back, he knows he can't shrug it all away again.  
He'll have to live with that, though, because he's not going to accept what Jared offered.  
He wants it all.  
He wants a fairytale, goddammit.  
So yeah, he had circles so deep and dark around his eyes that is no wonder the make up artist is taking so long.  
Finally, the woman steps back and clears her throat.  
Jensen blinks, half asleep.  
"I'm done?" he asks, yawning.  
She nods, but her eyes shift on the side as she worries her lower lip.  
Jensen's suddenly wide awake.  
"What's wrong, Sophia? What's wrong? Tell me!" he demands.  
Sophia takes another step back, scratching her neck uncomfortably.  
"Didn't you-didn't you read the scenes Jared added to the script?" she asks, slowly moving in front of the mirror.  
Jensen narrows his eyes.  
"I didn't" he growls.  
Sophia swallows, hard.  
"Er, you see...your character, he-he has an accident, and-"  
Jensen snaps up and pushes her away, finally getting a look at Sophia's work.  
There's a scar, a big, purplish, creepy scar running from his temple down to his chin, completely ruining the left side of his face.  
"Son of a bitch" Jensen hisses "he knows that's my best side."  
Sophia is trembling and carefully steps towards the door.  
If he knows him well, Jensen is going to burst in 3, 2, 1-  
"I'M GONNA KILL THAT FILTHY BASTARD!!"  
"You can't" she objects "they'll throw you in jail..."  
Jensen roars and throws a plate against the mirror, shattering it to pieces.  
Sophia squeaks and runs away as fast as she can, her hands pressed against her ears to keep the demonic screams out of her head.

 

 

"I'll kill him. I'll fucking KILL HIM!"  
Jensen keeps screaming like a banshee, trashing his room, then he grabs a crystal award from the table and stomps towards the door, dead set on finding Jared and smash his head with it no matter how long he'll have to search for the motherfucker, but in the end he doesn't have to search much.  
As he opens the door, Jared's standing there, a white rose in his hand and a smirk on his face.  
"Here, honey" he says, offering him the flower "Get well soon."  
Jensen really can't take the sarcasm, so he clenches his jaw and lifts his hand, ready to hit him.  
Jared simply arches an eyebrow.  
"Are you sure you want to hit me with that? It's the only award you've ever won, it could get damaged in the impact."  
Jensen actually ponders about it for a split second.  
"Don't care" he growls in the end, and Jared's world gets dark.

 

 

The preparations for the first night of the show are moving ahead full speed, and everything is almost ready when finally Jared gets back on his feet.  
"Jared! What happened?!" Alona asks, running towards him, as she takes in the purple bruise on his cheek and the humongous bump on his forehead.  
Jared chuckles bitterly.  
"My character had an accident" he answers, shrugging, before he turns around to look at the stage and starts giving directions.  
"Didn't I ask for two spotlights? And change those curtains! Come on, people, hop to it!"  
Alona sighs, and gets back to work.  
She knows Jared, he's not going to say anything more.

 

 

The show goes without a hitch.  
The guys are charming, funny, good looking and the audience goes mad.  
Some of them are better actors, others are better dancers.  
Some of them are just hot.  
The judges (an old soap star and a famous stylist) have nice words for all the contestants.  
"You're a jewel to be polished with care. You're stunning!"  
...well, almost all of them.  
"I've witnessed the greats, and you-honestly, what the hell are you here for?"  
Once the night is through, only 20 out of the 100 that passed the first selection remain on the stage.  
The announcer gets closer with the envelope, smiling brightly at the contestants.  
"The verdict's in! Thanks to all of you for your efforts. You all deserve to be Eric Brady, but life isn't easy. Some come, some go."  
"First up: Brock."  
Brock steps out of the group with a confident smirk on his face.  
"My name doesn't matter" he says "because I'll be Eric Brady, and that's what people has to remember."  
The announcer blinks.  
"Er, sure. If you say so. Brock, you are major league material. We have been able to see it since the first moment."  
Brock's grin widens, as he crosses his arms on his chest.  
"You have it all, charisma, talent-in fact, we've been wondering why did you apply for a role like this in the first place. You can get any roles you want, so don't be too sad. You're out!"  
Brock's face falls.  
"W-what?" he stutters, his eyes wide and his mouth agape.  
The announcer smiles apologetically.  
"Yeah. Sorry?"  
Brock clenches his fists so tight his knuckles go white, but show must go on, so he puts a plastic smile on and leaves the stage, shaking with rage.  
_This is NOT gonna end like this._

 

 

As Jared goes backstage to check on a few adjustments that need to be done for tomorrow's night, he spots him.  
Jensen is there, watching the show from a monitor, wearing sunglasses and a baseball cap.  
Jared chuckles, and approaches him.  
"You couldn't resist watching, uh?" he murmurs, next to Jensen's hear, and Jensen jumps in surprise, but recovers fast.  
He takes off his glasses, rolls his eyes and turns towards Jared.  
"I didn't come to watch, asshole" he answers "I came to give you a gift."  
Jared blinks.  
"What gift?"  
Jensen waves his hand dismissively.  
"Tell me, Jared, because there's something I don't get. That Brock guy, why toss him? He was the only one who's got what it takes."  
He sounds genuinely curious, so Jared pulls down the shield for a moment and smiles at him.  
"He thinks he's a star" he explains.  
"But the only star in this business is you."  
As he talked, Jared stepped closer, and now Jensen can feel his breath on his face.  
It does something weird to his insides, so after he has opened and closed his mouth a couple of times without being able to say anything, he just huffs and leaves.  
Jared stares at his back until he can't see him anymore, longing to just run after him and take him in his arms.  
Suddenly, he can't remember why shouldn't he.

 

 

Once they have wrapped up, only 10 contestants left, Jared is finally free to go home.  
On the windshield of his car there's a yellow envelope.  
_Here's the ending you stole from that other soap, remember? I'm sure your boss would be thrilled to know. You might just lose your movie..._  
Jared reads Jensen's note and then stares at the pages in his hands.  
How did they end up like that?  
He sighs, unlocks the door of his SUV and turns on the engine, but before he can drive away the passenger door opens and Brock slides inside.  
"So, let's be practical. If I fuck you, will I get the part?"  
Jared's mouth drops open.

"Wha-I'm not-"  
Brock snorts.  
"Yeah, yeah, like everyone in this industry, right? Listen, I don't care if you're straight or not. I can suck you off, deep throat you like a pro, and then you can fuck me. I guarantee you, my ass is tighter than any pussy you'll ever fuck, so."  
Jared blinks, too stunned to be able to formulate a complete thought, and Brock takes it as the green light he expected.  
He leans in and undoes Jared's belt, pushing his hand inside and wrapping it around Jared's cock, that has been half hard since he met Jensen.  
"Brock, you-dammit, I can't-"  
He can't finish his sentence, because voices start approaching and he can already hear flashes going off.  
Luckily he has dark windows, but he really can't risk for them to get closer.  
That means that he can't throw the kid out of his car as he wants to, either, so he just pulls Brock's hand out of his pants and drives away.  
From the corner of his eye, he can see Brock smirking.

 

 

"So, explain it to me once again, you sneaky bastard. You stole that scene from another soap?!"  
His manager sounds mightily pissed off, and Jared flinches.  
"Come on, he just wants to get even."  
"Did you steal it or not?"  
"No, Dan, for the umpteenth time, I didn't."  
From the other end of the line, his manager sighs.  
"Whatever. Let's just hope he's not going to really send it to the headboard, of we can be in trouble."  
Jared snorts.  
"It's all under control" he lies, knowing that if Jensen really decides to ruin him, he will.  
"Keep your boy toy in line, schmuck" his manager adds before hanging up on him, and Jared freezes.  
What the-he _knew_?!  
For all this time, he knew?!  
He rubs his forehead, sensing a major headache approaching, and things don't improve when he turns and sees Brock standing in his living room, wearing just one of his shirts.  
"What are you doing here?" he snaps, not feeling very gentle.  
Brock blinks.  
"What do you mean? After last night I stayed over, obviously."  
Jared rolls his eyes.  
"The way I remember it, last night I sent you home without touching you" he retorts, crossing his arms on his chest.  
Brock shrugs.  
"Well, the fact that you weren't in the mood back then, doesn't mean we can't get it on now, right?" he purrs, getting into Jared's personal space again.  
Jared grimaces and pushes him back.  
He _really_ doesn't like this guy.  
Brock smirks.  
"What's wrong, can't get it up? In the car you could."  
Jared glares at him.  
"I could because I wasn't thinking of you."  
The comment stings, and Brock's jaw twitches, but then he gets his trademark grin back in place.  
As he tries to step closer once more, Jared has enough.  
He grabs Brock's arms and pins him to the wall.  
"Listen to me, you little punk: I'm not gay, and if I was I wouldn't go for you, anyway. Besides, this will not get you a ticket to the finals: you are _out_ , and I can see now that it was the best decision we could have made. So, if you don't mind, I have things to do."  
Jared steps away and gets his jacket; as he puts it on, though, Brock breaks the silence.  
"Are you sure, Jared? Think it over a little more: you might regret it."  
Jared laughs, his hand already on the doorknob, and doesn't even turn around to look at Brock.  
"Do you want to play hard? Fine, let's play hard. Classier men than you, who I _did_ screw, have threatened me to get the part. Unsuccessfully. So, take my advice, kid: when you leave, close the door behind you."

 

 

Brock is stunned into silence for a few moments, after Jared has gone, then resolves to do the last thing he wanted to do: he calls his father.  
"Brock?! Get back home immediately, do you hear me?! You're making a fool of us!"  
Brock swallows.  
"Dad, they kicked me out last night."  
"You?!"  
"Yeah."  
"How dare them to-"  
"Everyone saw it. And that's not all."

 

 

Jensen gets to Jared's office with his brow furrowed.  
Jared has never called him to meet, not since- _since_.  
Inside the light is turned off, and Jared's back is turned to the door.  
"I surrender" he says, and his voice sounds tired.  
"If you plan to stoop so low and to stain everything, I give up."  
Jensen blinks.  
"I don't get it, Jay."  
Jared turns to face him and Jensen almost forgets he's mad at him.  
He looks-lost.  
"What is that you don't get, Jen? That I won't play as dirty as you do?"  
Jensen shakes his head.  
"No, what I don't get is why you don't play your trump."  
Jared chuckles bitterly, as he sits on the couch.  
"What trump? Tell the press you were a gigolo when I met you?"  
Jensen huffs.  
"Let's call things with their names, shall we? When you met me, Jared, I was a whore. Very expensive, but a whore nonetheless."  
Jensen swallows hard, stepping closer.  
"You're not throwing them the story? You could even-"  
Jared smiles tiredly.  
"No, Jensen. I won't."  
Jensen stares at him, as Jared hides his face in his hands and sighs, then he sits next to him.  
He still doesn't understand why Jared is so worked up by the stolen scene thing.  
"Just so you know, I wasn't going to really go public with it. I just wanted to scare you, not ruin you."  
Jared snorts.  
"You know perfectly well that it's not that."  
Jensen arches an eyebrow, confused.  
"Then what-"  
"This email is from one of our main sponsors; if they pull out, I'm fired" Jared explains, pointing at his computer screen.  
"The owner of the bank is threatening to leave if I don't rethink my orientation and some of my-lifestyle choices. Since there's no way in Hell he could have known, I'm guessing you're fucking him and he's doing this to impress you."  
Jensen shouldn't feel hurt, but he does.  
"No, Jared" he answers, sounding sad and regretful "I have nothing to do with this. Looks like getting with me wasn't your worst decision, after all."  
Jared realizes that his words could have been misinterpreted, and he's about to apologize when he gets it.  
"Of course, the fucking punk I took back to my place" he groans.  
"He was pissed off, and his dad's the boss of-"  
Jensen sneers.  
"Even without giving them the part, you're already screwing them. You don't lose time, do you, Jared?" he spats.  
"Wha-I didn't screw him!" Jared exclaims, but Jensen just rolls his eyes.  
"Oh, yeah, I'm sure it was a pyjama party" he retorts mockingly.  
Jared blinks.  
"Er. Yeah, basically that's it."  
Jensen stares at him, gaping, before he shakes his head and stomps away, and Jared's left alone yet again with a dread feeling in his chest.  
And it doesn't have anything to do with his career being about to sink.

 

 

Just before the show starts, all the contestants are gathered in the backstage, and more than one gasps as they see Brock strutting in from the backdoor.  
"So not fair" Colin whines "he was out!"  
Jake pats him on the shoulder.  
"Well, the fact that they got him back in doesn't mean he's gonna win, you know. The votes come from the audience."  
Colin smiles at him gratefully.  
"Yeah, you're right. Thanks, Jake."  
"Come on guys, it's show time!" Alona storms in waving her hands "everyone to their places, quick!"  
Brock walks to the front of the line, all smirks and confidence.  
"You thought I was gone" he hisses to Jake "you thought you could win."  
Jake's back is stiff.  
"Oh shut up" he mutters, but Brock goes on.  
"I don't know what your story is, but I'm going bald from starvation. I've had four plastic surgeries and I've been hospitalized twice for spitting up blood."  
Jake arches an eyebrow, anything but pitiful.  
"And all of that for what?"  
Brock looks taken aback by the question.  
"Well, that-because-"  
"Brock, you're on" Alona announces, and Brock just shakes his head to clear it up, moving forward, but just as he's about to step on the stage a hand grabs his arm and pulls him back towards a dark hallway.  
He turns around, ready to curse and maybe even punch whoever dared to do that to him, but he's surprised to see Jensen Ackles in front of him.  
"You're not going anywhere, prick. And your daddy's ads are staying on the air."  
Brock snorts.  
"You're just a crazy, old has-been that can't stand to be overstepped" he spats out.  
"You're not banging the producer anymore, so nobody gives a shit about you."  
Jensen narrows his eyes, and slams Brock against the wall.  
"What me and Jared have is way beyond you. I won't even try to explain it to you, you'd never understand it. What might sink in, however, is that your dad has a _special friend_ and, guess what? I know him. And since daddy wants it hush-hush, he's cool with you out of the show. The lesser of two evils, right?"  
Brock blinks, speechless.  
He doesn't know which of the facts shocked him most, him staying out of the show or his dad fucking a male whore.  
What he does know, is that he can't let it end like this.  
He glares at Jensen and steps towards the stage, but Jensen grabs his wrist and holds him in place.  
"Now what? Are you going to throw a tantrum on national TV? Come on, I'd like to see you try."  
Brock is about to shout that yes, that's exactly what he's going to do, before he realizes the embarrassment he'd have to face after that.  
And he's not sure his father would be all that happy if he did, either.  
Besides, it's not like it will be worth anything; if he's out, he's out, making a fool of himself won't change that.  
His shoulders sag, and Jensen moves back, grinning.  
"I knew you wouldn't. And you know why? Because you have to be born a star. You can't become one by reading People."  
Brock looks about to say something, but in the end he just walks away, his departure just as uneventful as his arrival.  
Once he's gone, Jensen finally lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding, as he pushes his back against the wall.  
Damn, that was close.  
Then he lifts his gaze and Jared's there, his eyes sparkling.  
"How long have you been there?" Jensen asks, and Jared smiles softly.  
"Long enough."  
He's about to add something, but is interrupted by Alona informing him that the boss has arrived.  
He looks at Jensen, apologetically, but Jensen just nods and mouths _Go_.

 

 

After the Brock accident, things keep going smoothly.  
Colin leaves after he's told that there's probably going to be a sex scene, and the rest is submitted to interviews and acting scenes.  
In the end, only Jake, Ben and Tom are left on the stage, as the announcer stops the phone calls from coming in.  
Jared's manager is ecstatic.  
"Hell of a rating, man! You make them and break them, it doesn't matter who won: this is going to be _epic_ nonetheless."  
Right behind him, Jensen clears up his throat.  
Jared turns slowly, and Jensen offers him a small smile.  
Truce.  
"Have you made your decision?" he asks.  
Jared nods, and gets down to the stage without saying another word.

 

 

"And Eric Brady is...Jake!"  
The room explodes in a symphony of shouts and clapping, as confetti fall from the ceiling and fireworks start going off from the four sides of the stage.  
Jake is reduced to a weeping mess, still unable to believe he has won the fucking contest.  
That single instant, when he heard his name called, lasted longer than his whole life; now the moment is gone, and everything has changed.  
Somehow, Jake has already trouble remembering how it was before.

 

 

All the contestants get back on the stage for the finally awarding, when the announcer frowns at something he's been told through his earpiece.  
He's nothing but a professional, though, so he recovers quickly.  
"Well, let's give it up for the man behind the myth, ladies and gentlemen, Jared Padalecki!"  
Jensen blinks from the backstage as Jared steps up, charming and smiling, with his dimples showing.  
The rest of the crew looks just as surprised.  
This was not planned.  
"Sorry to interrupt your party" Jared starts, turning towards Jake and shaking his hands.  
"Congratulation, Jake! You're the winner of our contest, but I have a surprise for you."  
He moves next to Jake and holds his shoulders.  
"Jake, you won't be Eric Brady" he states, and everyone gasps.  
Jake stares at him, confused, but Jared just grins at him.  
"You're going to be Eric Brady's son, because there's only one Eric Brady in this world, and that's Jensen Ackles."  
Jensen's eyes widen up, as Alona walks up to him, a smug smile on her face, to take him to the stage.  
Still dazed, Jensen follows her, finding himself suddenly amongst the contestants, the confetti, the spotlights.  
The audience is clapping and screaming and Jensen feels overwhelmed.  
"We know Jensen won't let us down" Jared is saying.  
"Eric Brady will still be himself, now more than ever. A real man, with a real baggage. The role Jensen has always wanted to play."  
When finally Jensen is in front of him, Jared grabs his wrist and pulls him closer, his eyes hopeful and full of something Jensen didn't think he was going to see on Jared's face ever again.  
The announcer is explaining what the movie is going to be about; Jensen doesn't hear him.  
Jared smile dims a little, and his hold loosens up as if to let him go, but Jensen simply rolls his hand and intertwines their fingers, tightly.  
Jared beams, and Jensen thinks that this, right there, it's what fairy tales and soap operas are all about.

 

**EPILOGUE**

_Hi, everyone, you might remember me: I'm Brock Kelly, former contestant for the Eric Brady's role.  
Well, God sends you signs.  
Mine was: why a stupid soap opera adaptation?  
What I really want is to be an international movie star, straight to the top, no shortcuts required.  
If you see it, you can go for it.  
And this time, I won't stop for anything._

***

A heavy rain is falling down on the first day of shooting, as Alona drives by in a golf cart.  
"Where the hell is the producer?!" she inquires, frustrated.  
The PA snickers.  
"Where do you expect him to be?"  
As if the man's words called out to him, Jensen's trailer's door opens and Jared steps out, followed by Jensen already in his full Eric Brady costume.  
"Jen, come on, don't be annoying!" Jared is whining "I announced it on national TV!"  
Jensen simply pushes him against the trailer's wall, rolling Jared's tie in his fist for him to lean down.  
"I can be his godfather. Or his uncle, maybe. But his father? No way."  
Jared rolls his eyes.  
"But Jensen, we could maybe paint you a few grey hairs-"  
Jensen puts a finger on Jared's mouth.  
"Do you want to make me mad?" he purrs, and Jared shakes his head, opening his mouth to suck Jensen's finger in.  
"Ugh, that's enough PDA you two! Get a room!" the PA exclaims, no real heat in his words.  
"We were in the trailer! You called us out!" Jensen retorts as he pulls his finger away and kisses Jared softly.  
"Jared! Jared, come on, we have work to do" Alona whines, and Jensen chuckles as he steps back.  
"I love you" he murmurs, before following the PA to the shooting stage.  
"What do we do about the rain?" Alona asks "call it off?"  
Jared, who's eyes are focused on Jensen, grins.  
"Nah, we shoot. I like rain."

END

 **MY THANKS GO TO** : [](http://blueeyedliz.livejournal.com/profile)[**blueeyedliz**](http://blueeyedliz.livejournal.com/) , [](http://chica-charlie.livejournal.com/profile)[**chica_charlie**](http://chica-charlie.livejournal.com/) , [](http://eledh-3.livejournal.com/profile)[**eledh_3**](http://eledh-3.livejournal.com/) , [](http://eryslash.livejournal.com/profile)[**eryslash**](http://eryslash.livejournal.com/) , [](http://free-pirate.livejournal.com/profile)[**free_pirate**](http://free-pirate.livejournal.com/) , [](http://liliaeth.livejournal.com/profile)[**liliaeth**](http://liliaeth.livejournal.com/) , [](http://maddonna001.livejournal.com/profile)[**maddonna001**](http://maddonna001.livejournal.com/) and [](http://orphan-project.livejournal.com/profile)[**orphan_project**](http://orphan-project.livejournal.com/) for support, handholding and proofreading as I went, and to [](http://burned-phoenix.livejournal.com/profile)[**burned_phoenix**](http://burned-phoenix.livejournal.com/) , [](http://lightthesparks.livejournal.com/profile)[**lightthesparks**](http://lightthesparks.livejournal.com/) and [](http://thepuppeteer.livejournal.com/profile)[**thepuppeteer**](http://thepuppeteer.livejournal.com/) for the amazing art provided. This fic has definitely been a group effort, people XD


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